One by one they fall. They splash into the tissue. They drip onto the shoulder of someone you trust.
Each teardrop has a time and place. Each teardrop has a story. Each teardrop has a purpose.
The word “purpose” makes many people cringe because let’s face it; we are often searching for purpose in the wrong places. We search for purpose in our possessions or in our status. We try to be what others envision for us and it leaves us feeling incomplete.
Every tear of joy and pain--it has purpose.
Here is where we need to interpret what the heck is going on here. We need to ask the following questions:
1. Where does this pain truly come from?
To understand the pain, we need to know the source of our pain. Did we encounter this pain based on choices we made? Is this pain coming from the actions of others?
2. What methods are we using to manage the pain?
As Americans, we love to numb our pain. Work more. Spend more. And wear masks to hide ourselves--more. We often control our pain by hiding in our addictions. Let's get real here---everyone has an addiction. It is a matter of being aware of the addiction. Food, sex, alcohol, drugs, media---these can all be addictions.
Some people reading this will argue that you can never have too much sex or too much media. Think about this: people desire intimacy with others. However, this involves people actually talking with others. If two people have sex but never communicate--they are lacking connection. If people are using social media all of the time but never chatting with people in face to face conversations, they will be lacking in connection.
Where do we go with our pain?
3. Who do we let into our pain?
The problem with our pain is that we often bury it. We don't talk about the pain. I would say this is typically a guy issue but the more I work in my field and also venture other ways in ministry, I believe this is a human issue.
Who do we let into the pain? Who can we trust with our pain? The question of who do we trust with our pain may be the biggest question we ask in our healing.
Talk to God.
A lot of people struggle here because we have made talking to God into a chore. Talk to God at church and in family prayer time. Talk to God like he is some deity that grants wishes like a genie. And talk to God like you are some peon and not worthy of His love. These are all dangerous approaches to speaking to God.
Talk to God like a friend. No religious tone and no thee's and thou's.
I think a lot of folks are not interested in our churches or Christianity overall because we have made life with God---complicated. We have made God a "for church-attending people only" idea. This is actually the opposite of what the Gospel says: GO OUT.
Other than God, find a few close people you can trust. These people should be people you can be real with. These people should keep your business confidential because everyone needs a safe place.
There is purpose in your pain.
Don't be quick to pin it on God.
Don't be quick to stuff it in the darkest corners of your heart and soul.